Memories of the past
by PoweredByDarkness
Summary: Jaina Proudmoore and Vereesa Windrunner have been through a lot in the past. They have lost people they loved, had done things they regretted and made wrong decisions. The memories of the past still haunt them and they no longer have many people they can trust. Apart from the rest of their families, they only have each other. But they only need each other. In more than one way.


A woman walked through the corridors of the grand library. She wore a white and purple coloured dress. Her hair was white. Total white except for a long strand of blonde hair. Despite the colour of her hair, the woman was not old. She was in her thirties but still looked as if she was in her twenties.

Her name was Jaina Proudmoore. She was the daughter of Daelin and Katherine Proudmoore, the current grand admiral of Kul'Tiras. The place where she was born. But she was not in Kul'Tiras. She was in Dalaran which library was known as the largest on Azeroth. Hundreds of thousands of books were there, subdivided into different categories and sorted after their titles.

The numerous shelves were filled to the brim with books. Some of them were well-preserved while others were damaged or about to fall apart. Lots of books were written in the common language most races on Azeroth spoke, while numerous were written in foreign languages. Eredun, the language of the demons, thalassian, the language of the high and blood elves and many other languages.

Jaina spoke the language of the humans, the common language and she was good at speaking thalassian. But her thalassian was not perfect. Not as perfect as the thalassian from the person she was looking for.

Arcanist Ivrenne had told her that she hadlast seen that person in the grand library. So, Jaina was walking through the corridors of the library, a thick book under her arm. The library was very large so searching through every corridor took a while but she found the person, she was looking for, eventually.

She was sitting in one of the reading corners of the library. A pillow stuck between her head and the wall against which she was leaning. She had crossed one leg over the other, a book laid on her lap. The colour of her hair was similar to Jaina's. It was silver, not white and there was no blonde strand of hair. The woman wore a light blue coloured tunic and matching trousers.

Her long ears twitched as she heard someone approaching her but she didn't look up because she didn't expect that person to be her best friend who was looking for her.

"Vereesa," said Jaina softly as she stopped right in front of the high elf. Vereesa lifted her head, her blue eyes widened when she recognized Jaina. "Hello, my dear," she said eventually.

A small smile appeared on the human's lips. "May I take a seat next to you?"

Vereesa didn't say anything, she just nodded her head. Jaina sat next to her, wrapping her arms around the elf's shoulders as she hugged her. Vereesa put the book aside and returned the hug. Jaina caressed her friend's back as she placed soft kisses on her cheeks. Vereesa did the same, smiling at the mage as she pulled away.

"What are you reading?" Jaina asked interested.

"The first volume of the chronicles of my people," responded Vereesa.

"How comes?"

Vereesa shrugged her shoulders. "I saw the book on a shelf and decided to have a look at it."

Jaina smiled. "And? Is it interesting enough?"

"It is indeed. The foundation of Quel'Thalas and the building of Silvermoon City are more exciting than I have expected."

Jaina noticed the small amount of sadness which was reflected by her friend's eyes. "You miss Quel'Thalas, don't you?"

Vereesa nodded silently.

Jaina stared into her eyes, waiting that she would say something.

"I miss my home. Sadly, I cannot return because Quel'Thalas belongs to the Horde since the majority of the survivors decided to join them for a reason I still cannot understand. How can they side with orcs and trolls after everything they have done to them in the past?"

"I wish I could answer your question but I have no idea why they have done that."

"Even if I am allowed to visit Quel'Thalas, there is no one I can meet and spend time with. The inhabitants of Silvermoon City won't like my presence because I'm siding with the Alliance. Sadly, nobody lives in my former home anymore. Windrunner Spire is nothing more than a dismal and abandoned place where banshees and several undead creatures do their mischief. I can't even pay Sylvanas a visit because she is siding with the Horde. It's not easy to meet her without needing to present a motion...," Vereesa's gaze rested on her feet, her voice reflected sadness.

She felt Jaina's arm around her shoulders but she didn't look up to her. She continued to look at her feet while she let all these bad thoughts go through her head. Jaina's hand caressed her cheek, the other toyed with her hair.

"I can feel you," spoke Jaina quietly. "I'm not allowed to visit Kul'Tiras since...," she paused, sadness and pain were reflected by her voice. "Since my father's death. My mother thinks I murdered my father. I am responsible for his death but I had no other choice... If I wouldn't have stopped him, innocents would have been killed which would have led to another war between the Alliance and the Horde. Nevertheless, it was wrong to oppose him. He was my father..."

Vereesa lifted her gaze, looking at Jaina who struggled hard to not break out in tears. She pulled her in a tight hug, whispering comforting words in her ears. "It's okay honey. Let it all out."

"I don't know where to start, to be honest. So many horrible things happened in the past. I don't want to bother you," muttered Jaina.

Vereesa exhaled, taking Jaina's face in her hands. She turned her head so she could stare into the human's blue eyes. She noticed the tears in the corners of her friend's eyes. "It's not a shame to show emotions, my dear. You had a difficult past. Yours was probably much more difficult than mine. You went through a lot, it's okay to cry. Let it all out."

"But I don't want to appear weak to you. I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable if I cry like a little child..."

The corners of Vereesa's lips formed a small smile. "You will never make me feel uncomfortable. On the contrary, I feel better when you are around me. You make me feel comfortable and help me wherever you can. I don't want you to hold back your emotions. We all need someone we can talk to about certain things. I'm always here for you and I will always support you. I would be honoured to help you to cope with the past."

A thankful smile appeared on the human's lips. "I'm glad I can entrust myself to you."

"You can tell me everything. I won't judge you for anything you will tell me. Just tell me what is bothering you."

Jaina took a deep breath, making a thoughtful face as she considered where she should start. "There are many things which haunt my mind."

"Start with the oldest and tell me about everything until we come to the recent things that bother you," said Vereesa.

Jaina took a deep breath and nodded her head. "I feel guilty for everything that happened to Arthas. I could have stopped him right in front of the gates of Stratholme. He would have never been turned if I would have managed to convince him not to slay the entire population of the city. Not only did I fail him but also the inhabitants of Stratholme..."

Vereesa was silent as she caressed Jaina's back, allowing her to speak further. "I loved him, I loved him so much but I couldn't prevent all the horrible things he did after he went to Northrend..."

"You are not responsible for what he did. He chose his own destiny. It was him and not you who did all these horrible things."

"But I could have prevented everything," Jaina threw in.

A comforting expression was reflected by Vereesa's face. "You can't know that. He went so far to get his vengeance. He didn't listen to you when you told him that purging Stratholme was wrong nor did he listen to you when you begged him not to go to Northrend. There was nothing you could have done for him, my dear."

"There must have been a way to change his mind," Jaina muttered, doubt was reflected by her voice.

"Which way? What should you have done? I assume even stripping in front of him wouldn't have changed his mind. From what you have told me, Arthas was very stubborn. He wouldn't have listened to you."

"You can't know that. You didn't know him at all. The anger changed him but the good and righteous Arthas was not fully gone. If only I would have managed to reach him..."

"But you didn't and it was not your task to fix that broken man. He chose his own destiny, a destiny no one could influence. Not even you, Uther or anyone else who was important to him managed to bring him back on the right path. You don't have to blame yourself for what happened to him. It's his fault, not yours."

A sad sigh escaped Jaina's lips. "I know you are right but..."

Vereesa raised an eyebrow. "But what?"

"I don't know, to be honest. I just can't stop thinking that I failed him and the people who died during his terrible reign."

Vereesa pulled Jaina closer, running her fingers through her snow-white hair as she pressed her head close to her chest. "I think you did the right thing when you decided to not join him in the slaughter of Stratholme. Your hands are free from the blood of innocents."

"But they are not free from the blood of my father," interrupted Jaina. Tears started to roll down her cheeks but Vereesa wiped them away before they could reach her chin. She caressed Jaina's cheeks, pulling her on her lap. She allowed her to cry while she held her and spoke comforting words in her ears. Vereesa didn't know how but somehow, she managed to comfort Jaina and convince her that she was not responsible for her father's death and for what Arthas did.

"Now that we covered that up, what's also haunting you?"

"Well," started Jaina but didn't speak any further. She made a long pause, collecting her thoughts. "There is something which haunts both of us. I can't forget what happened to Theramore. So many people died that day. My student Kinndy Sparkshine and," she paused, giving Vereesa a sad look. "I'm sorry what happened to Rhonin. I know I have already said it thousands of times but I really mean it."

Sadness was reflected by the high elf's face. "That day changed our lives forever. I have come to terms with Rhonin's death, at least I believe that. Sometimes, I have nightmares where I see him dissolving slowly as the mana bomb explodes and destroys most of Theramore. His death had turned my world upside down. I loved him with all my heart, you know."

Jaina's expression turned sad, she lowered her head and looked at her fingers. "We both lost the ones we loved the most. Arthas was corrupted by Frostmourne and turned into a monster. The Horde was responsible for Rhonin's death... He sacrificed himself to save me. Sometimes, I wish he would have saved himself and let me die. That way, your sons would still have a father. I'm not as important as he thought."

Jaina had expected that Vereesa wouldn't say anything, that she would remain silent or be lost in thoughts. She hadn't expected that the high elf would respond to her without hesitation. "Don't say that, my dear."

Jaina lifted her head slowly, looking at the other woman who had tears in the corners of her sky-blue eyes. "Why shouldn't I? You would rather have him alive than me, don't deny it. I'm not mad at you because of that. I understand you. He is the love of your life and the father of your children. I should have died and not him."

"Don't say that," repeated Vereesa, much louder this time. "Do not ever say that again." Tears ran down her cheeks, anger was reflected by her face.

Jaina's eyes were widened, her face reflected confusion. She hadn't expected her friend's outburst. She had never seen her friend so angry before. She had seen that Vereesa had been sad very often after Rhonin's death but she had never seen her angry at anyone, especially not at was wondering why Vereesa was so angry. She could only assume that she couldn't control her emotions because she was an emotional mess just like her.

Vereesa was churned up, she had no control over herself. She didn't want to be mad at her best friend but she couldn't bear that Jaina wished she would be dead. Jaina was more important to Vereesa than she thought. She was not only her best friend, but she was also one of the only friends she had. She was one of the only persons she trusted. Her oldest sister went through the Dark Portal a long time ago. She never returned so everyone thought she died. Her other sister Sylvanas was murdered and raised as a banshee. She and her people joined the Horde which meant Vereesa couldn't just see her whenever she wanted.

Jaina was the only friend she had left so the thought of losing her made her really sad. She didn't want to lose Jaina. Rhonin had sacrificed his life to save others. His death had left marks on her soul which would take a lot of time to heal if they could ever heal. His death had emotionally wounded her and she was not sure if she would ever get over his death.

Even if Jaina could bring Rhonin back in the exchange of her life, Vereesa wasn't sure if she would ever be happy. She might have her lover back but she would lose her best friend in return. That was not an option.

Jaina had raised an eyebrow as she looked at her, confusion was reflected by her face. "But why not? You wouldn't be an emotional mess if Rhonin would be still alive."

"Your death would have also affected me. You are my best friend, losing you would have been similar painful."

"But I'm not the love of your life, so you would feel at least a bit better."

Vereesa shook her head. "You are more important to me than you think," she said.

"But not as important as Rhonin," replied Jaina. She was sure Vereesa was sharing her opinion. It surprised her when she found out that Vereesa saw things differently. Her silence made her assume that she was as important to the high elf as Rhonin.

Jaina raised an eyebrow, staring at the other woman who still refused to say anything. She sighed, getting off Vereesa's lap. She sat next to her, staring into the elf's eyes in which corners tears were still formed.

"Except for my children and my nephew, I have nobody left who is important to me. Nobody except you and Sylvanas. I still love Sylvanas but she is siding with the Horde so it's difficult to spend time with her. The fact that we are friends doesn't make it easier," told the older woman.

Jaina didn't say anything in return. She just gave Vereesa a questioning look, signalising her to explain herself.

Vereesa sighed. "The last time, I saw her. She reproached me for spending too much time with the ex of the man who murdered her. But it's not your fault that she died, so..." Vereesa couldn't speak any further because Jaina put a finger on her lips, silencing her.

"I know it's not my fault but I still feel sorry for her. I've met her a few times before the fall of Quel'Thalas when I was younger. We barely talked but I considered her as a strict but amiable person. What Arthas did to her... I feel responsible, even though I don't have to."

Vereesa put a hand on her shoulder. "I already told you that you are not responsible for what he did. You have nothing to do with my sister's death. She may have a different opinion about that but she is not right. You did what you thought was right and my sister died as a hero. At first, I couldn't recognize her. I thought she was a monster but the more time I spent with her, the better I got known to her. I recognized my sister in her. Sadly, we don't meet each other very often. Not since Varian's death. Not since she became Warchief..."

Jaina gave her friend a small smile, patting her shoulders softly. "I believe that, once we defeated the Burning Legion, you will be able to spend more time with her if you want."

A small smile appeared on Vereesa's lips. "I hope so. Except for my sons and my nephew, she is the only family I've left. I've heard that there is a message from Turalyon which had been found recently. That could mean that Alleria is still alive but... I have followed so many false hints and I always ended up with nothing. I want to believe that this message is real and that my other sister is still alive but I'm not sure I can. Whenever I follow a hint, I have high hopes and end up disappointed."

Jaina caressed her left cheek. "You should still follow the hint. I've heard that your nephew wants to join the expedition."

Vereesa made a thoughtful face. "Maybe I should join Arator then. We have never received a message from Turalyon before. Maybe this hint is better than all the others. I have to find out if it is useful or if it only gives us false hopes."

"I hope you will find her. My older brother Derek disappeared during the second war. We never found his corpse but it's unlikely that he will return. But there is still hope that Alleria returns one day," responded Jaina.

Vereesa smiled. "You are right, my dear."

Jaina returned the smile.

"I'm just glad that Garrosh paid for his crimes. He paid for the destruction of Theramore and for the deaths of our loved ones," Jaina said after a while.

Vereesa nodded. "He won't bother us anymore."

"But the Burning Legion will," added the mage.

Vereesa took her hand, caressing it. "We handled every other threat before the Burning Legion. We will handle them as well."

"I hope so," spoke Jaina as she lowered her gaze and looked at their hands.

Vereesa put her hand under the other woman's chin, lifting it up. "We will defeat them. The Alliance is strong so is the Horde. If you want to admit it or not, we will need their help. I have to meet my sister and make sure she works with us."

"What if she doesn't want to?"

"Then I will kick her ass."

Soft laughter escaped Jaina's lips. "I would love to see that."

"You can if you join me."

"You mean on a diplomatic mission?"

Vereesa nodded.

"I really don't want to go to Orgrimmar," spoke Jaina. "Not after I tried to destroy it a while ago..."

Vereesa gave her an understanding nod. "That's why I'll ask her to come to Dalaran."

The mage raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure she will come?"

The elf shook her head. "I'm not sure. I can only hope she will accept my invitation. I'm not sure if she wants to ever see me again after I told her that I won't live in Undercity with her."

"Do you think she is still mad at you because of that?"

"I was never able to understand what is going on in her head when she was alive. That didn't change when she became undead. She is unpredictable but she can read me like an open book."

"I hope she will accept your invitation," replied Jaina. She smiled at Vereesa who returned her smile. The women stared in each other's eyes for a while, not saying anything else. Suddenly, Vereesa averted her gaze and looked at her fingers. She pulled her hands away and put them on her lap. Jaina frowned, regarding her friend with a raised eyebrow.

"What is wrong?" asked the younger woman.

"Nothing really," the elf replied quietly.

"I don't believe that for a second," said Jaina. She put her hand under Vereesa's chin, lifting it up. She made sure the elf looked into her eyes. "You can tell me everything, you know that, right?"

"I do but I'm not sure if you want to hear it."

"Just tell me what is going on in your mind."

Vereesa took a deep breath. She regarded Jaina's beautiful face. Her gaze fell on her full lips, moved to her rosy cheeks and then to her beautiful eyes. "I think I have a crush on you," admitted Vereesa after she had been silent for almost five minutes.

Jaina's eyes widened in surprise. Her heart was beating rapidly in her chest, so was Vereesa's. Her skin tingled nervously. She didn't know what she should respond but she couldn't say anything anyway because she had a lump in her throat. Vereesa was also very nervous and toyed with her fingers as she stared into Jaina's eyes.

Vereesa averted her gaze avert for a few moments, immediately regretting that she had told Jaina how she felt about her. She could only assume that the other woman was confused about her confession. She had told her how much Rhonin's death had affected her so it didn't make sense that she had confessed her feelings to her a while later. Nevertheless, had Vereesa done it spontaneously and she regretted it at this very moment. She didn't regret having those feelings for her. She only regretted that she had told Jaina that she liked her after she having an emotional talk with her.

Jaina broke up with Kalecgos recently. It was not unlikely that she was not over their separation yet. Vereesa had confessed her feelings to her at the most inopportune moment. What had she expected anyways? Jaina had only dated men before, it was very unlikely that she would date a woman. A woman with two children. How could she have been so stupid?

Vereesa was asking herself if she had ruined everything. She was asking herself if Jaina would see her with different eyes was asking herself if she had ruined their friendship. What had she done?

She noticed that tears ran down her cheeks. She was crying. But there was a hand which touched her cheeks and wiped the tears away. There was another hand which was placed under her chin and lifted it up. There was a pair of full and warm lips which were pressed against hers.

Vereesa's eyes widened as she realized that Jaina was kissing her. She was too stunned to react. She let Jaina kiss her. She didn't return the kiss or push her away. She let it happen and she felt happy. The longer the kiss held, the happier she felt.

She managed to regain control over her body and didn't hesitate to return the kiss. She put a hand on the back of Jaina's head, pulling her closer. She deepened the kiss and parted her lips, allowing the human's tongue to enter her mouth. Her tongue brushed past Jaina's and mimicked her actions as soon as she entered the mage's mouth. They shared a sweet and passionate kiss, pulling away as their lungs were out of air.

They breathed heavily, staring at each other. "I didn't expect that," admitted Vereesa.

"I didn't expect that you have feelings for me," replied Jaina.

"I have feelings for you since the first day we meet. When you visited Quel'Thalas for the first time. But you were in a relationship back then so I didn't say anything. I had the chance to confess to you when he broke up with you but I had fallen in love with Rhonin then so I ignored my feelings for you. But now that we're both single, I can tell you how I feel. The question is, do you feel the same?"

"Would I have kissed you if I wouldn't feel the same?" asked Jaina, giving her a smirk.

"Probably not."

Jaina put a hand on her cheek. "See."

Vereesa smiled at her, leaning in to press her lips against Jaina's. The mage returned the kiss, running her fingers through the elf's hair. The kiss they shared was much more passionate than the first one. Once again, they were out of breath as they pulled away. Vereesa sat on Jaina's lap. The human had wrapped her arms around the elf, one of her hands toyed with her ear. Vereesa's head rested on Jaina's shoulder, her eyes were closed as she enjoyed the close body contact.

"Do you think a relationship between us would work? What will the others say?" asked Vereesa, her voice reflected a small amount of insecurity.

"I don't care what the others think or say. We will never find out if a relationship works if we won't try."

"You are right but I don't know how I will tell my children about us."

Jaina smiled. "Give us a chance first and see if a relationship works. You will have enough time then to figure out a way how you will tell your children about us."

"You are right, my dear."

Jaina turned her head, placing a soft kiss on Vereesa's forehead.

"We will make it work," whispered Jaina.

Vereesa opened her eyes and stared into Jaina's. "Yes, we will."


End file.
